YJL

Yesterday, I received quarterly report from World Vision. In last quarter each year, there is always a sheet with written prayer, you can pray for sponsored child. I used to skim that sheet, read other stories on that sheet. That’s all. Somehow, this year, I want to pray. But I couldn’t, I know I only need to read it out, simply recite the prayer which World Vision has written for us. I can’t, just can’t do that.

It’s not what I don’t want to pray for the child, but I think if I do that, I insult the God they believe in. That is the tricky part, I don’t believe in the existence of the God they believe in. Actually, I don’t believe in any God from religions.

I think the God is our heart, we all have and probably the same one. Who is our conscience and intuition. Even the God tell us what’s right to do, but not everyone would follow.

Human is strange, they like to be told resolution again and again. They already know the answers but prefer to hear from others. They have the most brilliant brains in this planet but prefer to act as animals do (I feel I just affront animals). They love seeing the love in animals but prefer to declare a war with else. They love giving hope but prefer to regret later. They love speaking but prefer not to listen to themselves.

Rights and wrongs are just about a foot far. How long do you need to think and to take it right?

I have been doing wrong for one thing for almost four years. If you know it, you would probably think I am stupid and silly. I suffer because I still don’t say that. It’s a simple word but very powerful, it can dissolve any situation if you say it from your heart.

I can’t face the God, the life, and myself.

[1]	http://kyriaabrahams.blogspot.com/2008/11/dreams.html is gone.